New Years Goal Setting
Tricia Gehl, Boon Coach
One of my goals for 2022 is to watch more TV. I’m not kidding. I currently only turn on my television once per day to watch a recorded episode of General Hospital (don’t judge me). As a lifelong voracious reader, I spend any down time I have plowing through as many books as I can get my hands on. I love stories! As a reader, I love to consume them; as a writer, I love to tell them. This year, I want to spend more time engrossed in some of the amazing stories that are being told on television and digital streaming services. Setting goals is often deeply personal and can seem daunting. So, what’s the first step?
Where to Start
Pick a theme
One of my themes for 2022 is joy; I want to experience as much joy as humanly possible. I recently sat down and made a list of all the things that bring me joy: exceptional stories, reading, dogs, RuPaul’s DragRace, boozy brunches with my friends, spending time with my nieces and nephews, traveling, raucous laughter... I can go on and on. I told myself that if I focus on things that to me embody joy, then any hobby, task or project goals I set within those spaces are likely to bring me joy as well.
Connect your goals to your values
The more passionately connected you are to a goal, the more likely you are to achieve it. Connecting your goals to your values is an easy way to help stay motivated and inspired. Have a top value of humor? Think about goals that would include fun, laughter, and joy while you’re tackling them. Do you value nature? Perhaps centering your goals in outdoor pursuits or building in extra time to be outside (yes, even while working), may help you cross that finish line. Our values are our most powerful and accurate measuring stick; grounding your goals in your values will keep you on the path toward fulfillment and satisfaction.
Make sure your goals are yours
Want to make VP at your firm? Great! But is that what you really want? Is that an internally driven, burning passion of yours, that ticks all the boxes around what you want and need out of your career? OR is that simply the next logical career step for someone in your field, at your point in life, in your family, and so on and so on? Is that what you genuinely want to do next, even though the thought of taking on the responsibilities associated with that role have you already wanting to run and hide? Asking yourself these tough questions will help you get to the “why” behind the goal, which is where we find out whether it’s truly aligned with our wants and needs.
Staying the Course
Focus on the future. I often ask clients to describe to me what they’ll feel once they achieve their goal. I challenge them to dig deep and vividly imagine what thoughts and emotions will come up for them once they’ve crossed that finish line. Focusing on the often victorious and euphoric thoughts and emotions associated with accomplishing a goal is fuel to keep you motivated and on track.
But live in the “now.” When we over-focus on goals and the satisfaction we’re certain they will bring us, we run the risk of falling into the “if only...” thinking trap.
“If only I could get that promotion, I would be happy.”“If only I could find the right partner, I would feel whole.”
Sound familiar? Don’t forget to live in the present and enjoy what you have now, while working toward your goalsGive yourself permission to change your mind. Clients regularly talk about failure and giving up when it comes to not reaching goals. Did you fail or did you just lose interest in the goal itself? Did you give up, or did you simply realize that the original goal you set no longer works for who you are, right here, right now? Giving yourself permission to change directions is key; if you don’t, you may end up wasting precious time and energy chasing goals that no longer serve you.
———————————————————————————————————————————